The 213 things Sergeant “Skippy” Schwartz is no longer allowed to do:
http://www.avalanchetankers.us/archives/000058.html
I particularly liked:
#33. Not allowed to chew gum at formation, unless I brought enough for everybody.
#34. (Next day) Not allowed to chew gum at formation even if I *did* bring enough for everybody.
Really, wouldn’t it be simpler if they just instituted a rule that said “No brown people allowed”?