Notes from the Summit

From an insider’s account of last month’s failed EU summit in Brussels, which has just reached me:

In the first of what was to be a series of sexist remarks which continued until the early hours of the morning, Berlusconi suggested that they should talk about ‘women and football’ instead, adding for good measure that he was sure that Gerhard Schroeder – who has been married four times – would be able to bring considerable expertise to bear during their discussion. (footnote: The impact of these remarks was somewhat diminished by the fact that some of the interpreters apparently refused to translate them.)

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Inside the Clinton White House

Thanks to Patrick Nielsen Hayden, an article by President Clinton’s official joke writer, Mark Katz, in the Washington Monthly. Two lines stand out:

“We need some ground rules here: The national security advisor can kill any joke he likes on the grounds that it compromises national security. But he can’t kill a joke because he doesn’t think it’s funny.”

And the line that made Katz’ reputation, for Clinton’s speech marking a hundred days in office:

“I’m not doing so bad. I mean, at this point in his administration, William Henry Harrison had been dead for sixty-eight days!”

[update: of course, I get in to work and find that a colleague who worked at senior level in the Clinton White House has sent me two chapters of her memoirs to read. I’ve sent her a note asking if she knew Mark Katz…]

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IKEA again

We put up all the new shelves today, children dancing around us merrily.

And the we rearranged all my sf books onto the new shelves.

Category 1: sf and fantasy novels or collections of stories by a single author: roughly 500.

Category 2: sf and fantasy anthologies of stories by different authors: roughly 100.

Category 3: books about sf or fantasy literature: 15.

Category 4: issues of digest-size magazines (Analog, Asimov’s, F&SF): 15.

It looks glorious, thanks largely to my lady wife. And there even appears to be some space left. But not for long, I suspect.

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Lord of the Rings: A Source-Criticism Analysis

From Teresa Nielsen Hayden:

The Lord of the Rings: A Source-Criticism Analysis.

Finally, we can only guess at what the Sauron sources might have revealed, since they must have been destroyed by victors who give a wholly negative view of this doubtlessly complex, warm, human, and many-sided figure. Scholars now know, of course, that the identification of Sauron with “pure evil” is simply absurd. Indeed, many scholars have undertaken a “Quest for the Historical Sauron” and are searching the records with growing passion and urgency for any lore connected with the making of the One Ring. “It’s all legendary, of course,” says Dr. S. Aruman, “Especially the absurd tale of Frodo the Nine-Fingered. After all, the idea of anyone deliberately giving up Power is simply impossible and would call into question the most precious thesis of postmodern ideology: that everything is a power struggle on the basis of race, class and gender. Still… I… should… very much like to have a look at it. Just for scholarly purposes, of course.”

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Careers advice

I get a lot of people coming to me asking how they can get a job like mine. This was my most recent reply:

Dear X,

Thanks for your letter of 1 January. As an astrophysics graduate myself I sympathise with your position as a technologically literate individual who wants to get into the more exciting world of international relations. If you’re interested in how I got here, my CV is at http://explorers.whyte.com/cv.htm .

I have to say that your experience, extensive and impressive as it is, doesn’t immediately signal [my employers] as an appropriate next place of employment. Of the three heads of field offices currently on my team, one has years of writing politically sensitive material combined with some time spent managing international aid programmes in the former Soviet Union, and the other two actually have doctorates in the politics of the regions they work on backed up by experience of working on the ground. Academic qualifications are not indispensable for this line of work (though they certainly help); however field experience, preferably in a politically sensitive role, is completely essential. For more junior positions, while experience is less of an issue, linguistic skills are very important. (In any case I don’t think you are interested in a junior position.)

If you’re really keen to get into the sort of work we do, I suggest you put your foot in the water by getting onto the OSCE/ODIHR election observation mission for the coming Georgian parliamentary elections, whose date has been announced today as March 28th. [Your country’s foreign ministry] will by now be desperately hunting for people to send, and if you can actually pronounce “Tbilisi” they will probably not hesitate to offer you a place. That will at least allow you to get a sense of what the work is like, or could be like, and also gives you a head start in looking for OSCE field positions. The other option, which is what I advise everyone who asks me this question, is simply to choose a target country, move to its capital for a month, and knock on doors until you find a job. (I admit that although I give everyone this advice I am not at all sure that anyone has taken it!)

I’m sure there is international work out there in the sort of area we work in for you. If you do end up in Georgia in March let me know and I’ll put you in touch with our head of office there.

Best of luck,

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IKEA

I have emulated and visited IKEA. First with F to get another two 2.26 metre bookshelf ends and eight 83 cm and another eight 42 cm shelves to put on them as we attach them to the existing shelves in the study. That should make for another 10 metres of bookspace. I fear it won’t be enough but it will reduce the number of homeless books floating around the house. Also got two new bedside lights; amusingly they are called Grönö and I have a colleague whose surname is Grono.

F was a good boy but IKEA is not the ideal place for a four-year-old. When I discovered that I’d only got two of the reinforcing struts for the new shelves (instead of four) I went back on my own.

Now, of course, we have to actually put them up…

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The Bush twins

I heartily recommend Jessa Crispin’s Bookslut blog to anyone interested in reading, er, books. She has a tantalising little snippet on the Bush twins:

Back when I worked at Austin’s Planned Parenthood, we were a bit obsessed with the goings on of the Bush twins. Everyone had a Jenna Bush story in that town. And if there’s one thing I miss about pre-September 11th media coverage, it’s the regular updates on the girls. (I wonder if the Bush twins blog is still around…) But this excerpt from The Perfect Wife: The Life and Choices of Laura Bush almost makes up for it.

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Plaxo

I’ve signed up to this address-book management site, Plaxo. I’ve let it loose on my Outlook address book and have been very impressed by the results. On the other hand it’s going to be rather difficult to do on my non-work contacts because I use Eudora for my home email and have never bothered with the address book – which itself looks pretty clunky. I started last night trying to create an address book inside Eudora with the idea being that I would then somehow import it to Outlook at work and then integrate it with the Plaxo list. But Eudora crashed within a quarter of an hour, so I may have to try another tactic…

There seems to have been a lot of paranoia on some of the discussion boards about Plaxo. I have to say that for me the convincing thing was when the first two friends of mine using it turned out to be an American who administers large amounts of foreign aid for Africa and a European who has a sensitive political posting in the Caucasus. I reckoned if they felt it was secure enough for their needs, it is very unlikely to be unsatisfactory for me.

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Careering

An important day yesterday in my career thoughts. First of all I had a phone call from a former colleague asking if I could make sure his ex-wife gets interviewed for an administrative job that’s open at my work. I duly did so (though I won’t be making the hiring decision so it’s now up to her to impress at the interview stage). Then he told me of his latest scheme to get one of the jobs with the ten new Commissioners to be appointed in May. Interesting but not surprising that he, like me, is looking in that direction; fortunately he’s an economist and I’m marketing myself as a foreign policy expert, so we are not in competition. Like me he had had a look at the list of likely Commissioners and written personally to those he knows (I know only one, but he knows three or four). Then – the revelation – he realised that the ambassadors of each country to the EU are the ones drawing up lists of potential candidates, and so he is writing to them individually. Not a bad idea. I hope to meet next week with the person at the UK Permanent Representation who is responsible for promoting UK citizens as candidates and will check with her to see if she advises this approach.

And at the Liberals’ New Year party last night (which as already noted culminated in drinking some rather nice whisky and whiskey) I discovered that a) the current Dutch Commissioner, a liberal, is tipped to stay on and is a friend of several friends of mine and b) the Finnish liberals think that they will get a turn at having the Finnish Commissioner this coming year, as all the previous ones have been social democrats. Also my friend Sophie has been selected for a fairly safe seat in the coming European parliament elections, which is good news for her. (When her husband left his previous job, I took her out for lunch in order to decide if I should apply for it. She persuaded me not to.)

So things are bubbling away. I’m suffering New Year blues with my current job anyway and getting eager to move on.

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Oh dear

Just staggered home after a fun liberal evening of networking etc. Had been at this reception for about an hour when one of the liberal MEPs present invited me and various others to come and sample his reserves of Scotch. My only objection is that some of it turned out to be Irish rather than Scotch, specifically Midleton which I had not previously encountered and is very nice indeed.

I’m home now. I don’t anticipate that tomorrow morning will be a particularly fun experience…

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Are you a blogaholic?

What really gets me is that the test claims to have been done by over 10,000 people…

Are You A Blogaholic? Results
Your Score: 36 / 100

YOUR SCORE

36.0% 36.0 points out of 100

AVG SCORE

43.2% 43.2 points out of 100

10400 people have taken this silly test so far.

6470 people have scored higher than you.

3059 people have scored lower than you.

871 people made the same grade as you.
What does this mean? *
36 points is in the 21 through 50 precent
You are a casual weblogger. You only blog when you have nothing better to do, which is not very often. There’s nothing wrong with that. But if you’d post a little more often, you’d make your readers very happy.

* These results are just for fun. Do not sue me. Have a sense of humour.

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Joan Aiken

I see that Joan Aiken died at the weekend, aged 79. I really loved her stories as a kid, and particularly remember her collections A Small Pinch of Weather and A Harp of Fishbones, and when I was a little older the series of The Wolves of Willoughby Chase, Black Hearts in Battersea, and Night Birds on Nantucket. It seems she was still writing to the end and her last novel will be published in the spring. I’m sad to hear that there will be no more.

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January Books 3) 1610

3) 1610: A Sundial in a Grave by Mary Gentle.

Let’s be quite clear. Mary Gentle’s Ash: A Secret History is one of the best genre books I have read. When I discovered, shortly before Christmas, that she had a new novel out, I went out and bought 1610: A Sundial in a Grave at huge expense in hardback from the massively over-priced Waterstone’s in the middle of Brussels.

Well, I should have trusted John Clute rather than Cheryl Morgan. 1610 is a good book, all right, a fascinating and somewhat kinky look at the year of the title and the possibilities of changing history. But of course any fictional scenario involving deterministic prediction of the future has to actually find a way of averting said deterministic prediction to make the plot interesting; I have never seen that done convincingly and this is no exception. I felt I recognised too many elements from both Ash and the only other Mary Gentle book I’ve read, The Architecture of Desire (also set in a seventeenth century that never was – cf Pepys) without really much new being added. And basically it is too long. A good book, but you should wait for the paperback.

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More from Macedonia

Trajkovski Didn’t Call Danish Singer to Perform

“President Trajkovski has never had a contact with Sani Carlson, alias Whigfield, whose interview was published in the Maxim magazine. This is a completely made-up event which is insulting for the President and the members of his family”, they say in the President’s Cabinet in relation to the claims of the Danish pop star that the Macedonian president wanted to see her breasts. The Cabinet says that the Macedonian Embassy in London is undertaking activities for pressing charges against the magazine for publishing lies.

The daily Vest writes that Whigfield performed in Skopje in October 1999 as part of the presidential campaign of Vasil Tupurkovski. Tupurkovski says that he saw the singer after the last campaign rally and shook hands with her and her managers before she left Macedonia. “I don’t know who she is referring to in the interview. I have never been a president nor do I have a presidential palace and I know who Samantha Fox is from her videos”, Tupurkovski stated for the daily.

It is still not known who was the president who asked Whigfield to bare her breasts.

Sources: Vest, Utrinski Vesnik, A1 TV (30 December 2003)

Well, I think that solves the mystery. Tupurkovski’s denials have a ring of desperation about them (“I know who Samantha Fox is from her videos”); I’d certainly see him as a much more likely central character for this story than Trajkovski or Gligorov, and while he may not have a palace per se he was certainly doing a lot of construction with the slush money he got from Taiwan in 1999. And I can understand Whigfield being confused about the difference between a president and a candidate. Let’s be charitable and assume it was one of Tupurkovski’s aides having a little joke.

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Macedonia latest

From the daily news summaries I get from Macedonia, courtesy of NATO:

Danish Pop Star Claims Macedonian President Wanted to See Her Breasts

The British magazine “Maxim” in its latest issue publishes an interview with the Danish pop-star Whigfield, who claims that she sang for the Macedonian president. “I received a phone call from a guy who worked for the Macedonian president. He wanted Samantha Fox to sing for him, but she refused, so I went. We landed at his palace and during my performance, one of his aides asked me: ‘The President wants to know when you are going to take off your bra’. It turned out they didn’t have the courage to tell him that Samantha Fox didn’t show up so he thought I was her. I don’t have large breasts, so I said: ‘Tell the president to go to hell, I am not showing them'”. In her interview, Whigfield doesn’t say when this happened.

Source: Vest (Macedonian daily), 29 December 2003

Other versions of the story here and here.

I have to say it seems most unlikely to me that this story is about the clean-living Methodist local preacher who is currently President of Macedonia, and has been since 1999; if memory serves me right Whigfield hasn’t had a hit since 1995. It also seems a bit unlikely (though perhaps not impossible) that it’s about Kiro Gligorov, who was president from 1990 until 1999, given that he was born in 1919 and unlikely to be much troubled by impure thoughts about Whigfield or Samantha Fox. But the killer detail is her mention of the “royal palace” (not in the version quoted above but in both the links). There is no official presidential (or ex-royal) palace in Macedonia; the Presidency offices are actually a set of corridors in the parliament building. So I suspect it was actually a different president in a different country, or just possibly the story is entirely fictional and linked with Whigfield’s current relaunch of her career.

The Macedonian translation suggests that Whigfield was shy about showing the President her breasts purely because she thought they were too small to be exposed to the presidential gaze. The other two versions of the story both imply (more believably) that she was offended by the request. Funny how cultures differ on these things…

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January books 2) Samuel Pepys

Samuel Pepys: The Unequalled Self by Claire Tomalin

This book richly deserves all the praise it has received. I’d sort of prepared for it earlier in the year, when I came across the third volume of Arthur Bryant’s biography (first published in the 1930s), and then again encountered Pepys in Neal Stephenson’s Quicksilver. So I was aware that Pepys was a senior naval civil servant who dabbled in science (he was President of the Royal Society when it published Newton’s Principia so his name is on the title page) and famously kept a secret diary. (The Secret Diary of Samuel Pepys, aged 26-35???)

But Tomalin makes him really come alive. The early period, when Pepys witnessed civil war in the streets of London, and truanted from school to watch King Charles I’s head being cut off, is superbly depicted, as is the story of how he used distant family connections to climb away from his humble origins (his father was a tailor, his mother a laundrywoman). Then we follow him through the uncertain times of Cromwell, a hasty (and ultimately childless) marriage to a fourteen-year-old bride, and then the dramatic year of 1660, when suddenly everything goes right for him; he starts keeping a diary on January 1st and within a few weeks he is chatting to Charles II on the boat bringing him back to England to retake the throne.

For the 1660s, of course, Tomalin is helped by the existence of Pepys’ diary – and anyone interested just in the skill of writing should just sign up pepysdiary to their friends list and follow it day by day. The political stuff is fascinating, and as an aspirant on that career path myself I would make this compulsory reading for all young wannabee statesman. Among other jewels, Pepys is the man who tells the King that the Great Fire of London has broken out in 1666. And he intermingles love, politics, mistresses, religion, illness, friendship into what can rapidly become an addictive combination. The diary lay hidden in plain view in Magdalen College Cambridge for a century and a half after his death before it was decoded; a full version, leaving in all the naughty bits, wasn’t published until the 1970s.

The post-1669 story is inevitably a bit flatter, because mostly gained from secondary sources. (Pepys stopped keeping a diary because he was worried that he was losing his sight, though in fact he had no real problems with it in the remaining thrity-four years of his life.) Even so, he gets elected to Parliament, imprisoned in the Tower of London, demolishes the British naval base at Tangier in Morocco, publishes Newton’s Principia and rapidly acquires a new permanent lady friend after his wife dies. Tomalin leaves us with a sympathetic but honest portrait of a man who saw his entire world (a world which actually didn’t extend very far out of London) change in his lifetime, and left us a unique chronicle of what he thought about it. Strongly recommended, to anyone who likes a good story.

January books 1) Home Rule

1) Home Rule: An Irish History 1800-2000 by Alvin Jackson. A really absorbing book, drawing the parallels between various political initiatives of the last 200 years (especially the similarities between the operation of Stormont and Gladstone’s proposals for the whole island), and daring to speculate how things could have worked out differently – particularly, say, on the question of how things could have looked if Parnell had lived. I felt he lost focus a bit in the last couple of decades (partly because of course we still don’t know how the story ends) and wished he had written a bit more about the centrist tradition (“part of the problem… has been the centrists themselves”) but I was particularly struck by things I learned about three personalities:

i) Sir Horace Plunkett – a liberal reforming Unionist who was the hero of one of the chapters of my Ph D thesis, as he created a specifically and partly democratically accountable agriculture ministry for Ireland in 1899, at a time when the rest of Irish government was run entirely by Westminster appointees. But Jackson blames him unequivocally for the collapse of the Irish Convention, a session of peace talks in 1916-17 which Plunkett chaired and (by all accounts) completely mismanaged. I suspect Jackson is right. In Plunkett’s archives I found a letter from George Bernard Shaw to Margaret Digby, Plunkett’s first biographer, telling her that Plunkett invariably demanded to chair any public meeting he attended: “I have, perhaps, more experience of public meetings than most people, and I can attest that Plunkett was the worst chair I have ever encountered” or words to that effect.

ii) Terence O’Neill – another liberal reforming unionist, whose reputation will surely not recover soon from the mauling Jackson and other have given it in recent years. Jackson is scathing about what O’Neill’s lack of experience says about the political system he ended up in charge of: “…no political experience whatever at the time of his election to Stormont in 1946. In addition, he had no third-level education and no professional success – or, indeed, sustained business or professional experience of any kind… And yet, in the uncompetitive environment of Stormont, O’Neill found himself a junior minister at the age of thirty-four, a seior cabinet minister at the age of forty-two, and prime minister while still aged only forty-eight.” Jackson attributes O’Neill’s failure to his inability to build support for his programme among his own MPs and voters, but I’m a bit puzzled by his conclusions about the relations between economics and nationalism, which could bear a bit more investigation.

iii) rather to my surprise, my father appears briefly as an actor in one of the footnotes. His early academic work on 1850s Ireland and his later work on discrimination under the Unionist regime of course are cited at the relevant places, but I’m stunned to find, in the months following the suspension of Stormont, G.B. Newe writing to Brian Faulkner urging him to meet my father, and then writing to Ken Whitaker a few weeks later that “I have at last persuaded him [Faulkner] to take the advice, or at least listen to the advice of a couple of good political scientists here”. Faulkner’s shift from hard-liner to reconciler was one of the big surprises of that year, and unfortunately my father is no longer around to ask about it. Ken Whitaker is, though.

In summary, not a book for beginners in Irish history or politics, but an essential book for enthusiasts.

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December Books 12) Gateway 13) Eats Shoots and Leaves

12) Gateway by Frederik Pohl. As good as I remembered it as being. Wrote full review for my website.

13) Eats Shoots and Leaves by Lynne Truss. An occasionally entertaining rant against contemporary (lack of) punctuation. I think it’s all a bit exaggerated myself; language is dynamic, not static, and I doubt that the level of literacy in general has deteriorated much in recent decades; what has happened is that more people are writing, so you are more likely to encounter people with poor writing style than would have been the case fifteen years ago.

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